“I wanted to exclusively breastfeed but it didn’t work out that way”

I had it in my head it was going to be perfect

When I was pregnant I had it in my head that I wanted to exclusively breastfeed and that I would totally nail it first time. I had no negative thoughts about it and just went with the flow. 

I did, however, take some emergency ready-made bottles to the hospital as a back up as this was advised by the midwife. 

My son was born very poorly

When my little boy Henry was born he was poorly so had to go to NICU and have a cannula of antibiotics. Once his temperature came down and was stable the midwives came back and instantly put him on me in the labour room and he latched straight away. 

We went down to recovery where we would spend the next five days while Henry was on antibiotics.

In hospital, I struggled to breastfeed

I actually struggled quite a bit with breastfeeding because he was hungry and not much was happening. The midwives tried to help me to hand express some colostrum but we couldn’t get anything. I was getting quite worked up because he had jaundice and was recovering from an infection and he was starving. He would scream and scream due to being hungry. 

The midwives tried to help me to hand express some colostrum but we couldn’t get anything

I caved and gave him a bottle and he instantly settled and that gave me so much peace. However, we did carry on and soon we were able to breastfeed. I did end up naturally combi-feeding and we were both happy with this. 

CMPA diagnosis

Henry did develop CMPA from the formula and we had a few nasty symptoms such as wheezing, constipation and passing out. He’s on special formula alongside the breastfeeding. 

Henry did develop CMPA from the formula and we had a few nasty symptoms

As I’m allergic to cows milk I’m dairy free and so there hasn’t been a problem continuing to breastfeed alongside the formula. This was such a relief for me.

So whilst I know we aren’t exclusively breastfeeding, he still gets tonnes of my milk throughout the day which is full of goodness while he grows. 

My advice would be to have a plan but be adaptable

My advice would be to definitely have a plan to breastfeed but also prepare yourself for things happening beyond your control and which you may need to adapt to. For me, my initial plan went out the window due to Henry having an infection and jaundice at birth. 

I’m proud of where we are and the journey we have had so far. The bond that is created through breastfeeding is magical and beautiful. I wouldn’t change it for the world! I love my little boy Henry so much.

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