Breastfeeding my toddler has helped us navigate the ‘terrible twos’

My daughter is 25 months now and we’re still breastfeeding. I will be honest, I never thought I would get to this point.

Whilst breastfeeding a toddler has changed so much since she was a baby, it still carries so many benefits for her.

My initial goal was to breastfeed for one year

I always thought I wanted to exclusively breastfeed for 1 year and I did and when I reached that goal, I realised I didn’t want to stop. My little girl started childcare at that stage and I went back to full time working in my business. I knew I didn’t want to pump so had been wondering if I could stay feeding her even whilst she was in childcare. So, I decided to start combi feeding. She got goat’s milk or cow’s milk during the day if she wanted it and I continued to breastfeed in the mornings, evenings and during the night.

I always thought I wanted to exclusively breastfeed for 1 year and when I reached that goal, I realised I didn’t want to stop.

I pumped my breast milk for the first week or two during the day just to relieve engorgement but after that my supply adjusted and we stayed feeding. Interestingly after a few weeks she no longer wanted milk during the day. She was happy to wait for mum in the evening and get the real deal!

The biggest thing I have noticed about her breastfeeding habits is that the minute she gets back from childcare she asks for booby. Yep, she can ask now, and that is one massive thing I wasn’t aware would happen. Once she has those 5 minutes with me, she is a completely different child, much happier, relaxed and content. It is like her little connection with mum after childcare and a way for us to just reconnect again after a busy day. To be fair I enjoy it too. It’s like a little de-brief and gets me off work-mode and back into mum-mode for the evening.

Petrina' O'Halloran breastfeeding her toddler daughter

Breastfeeding a toddler can help regulate their emotions

The other big difference I have noticed with breastfeeding at this age is the assistance with emotional regulation. Any time Aisling might be over-tired, frustrated or just not happy and crying uncontrollably. I cuddle her up and ask her does she want boobie. 99% of the time she says yes. Afterwards I ask is she feeling ok now, and she always looks back up at me and smiles and says yes, as if it’s her little thank you, for helping her with managing her feelings!

The terrible twos are hard enough, but I just feel I have this tool in my back pocket that can help manage that transition and help her manage her emotions. She knows to ask for me if she needs me. She knows I will be there to help her though it, and I think that is a very powerful thing we can teach our kids. They can reach out and ask for help and we can assist!

The terrible twos are hard enough, but I just feel I have this tool in my back pocket that can help manage that transition and help her manage her emotions.

Breastfeeding at the toddler age is easier than it was when they were babies. Yes we are still having sleepless nights, but I think that’s more to do with her than breastfeeding. She even has those when I am not there. The biggest thing I have to manage is her gymnurstics while I feed, especially at home. She likes to try climb the couch, climb onto my back, and sit in a squat position whilst we feed. She will then give a big giggle as she knows she is being comical! 

For anyone thinking about breastfeeding past 1 year, I’d say just go for it. Feed the way that works for you and your family. I have decided now to stop breastfeeding when we are both ready. I thought that was happening during the Summer when she had some boob resistance so I didn’t push it and took her lead. It coincided with a family holiday, so we were spending much more time closely together. She just started asking for it again and we were back on track.

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