I stopped breastfeeding my toddler when I was pregnant

My daughter, Indie, was born 10th October 2020. I had always planned to breastfeed but also bought some bottles and formula ‘just in case’.

I did a lot of research about breastfeeding, and followed a lot of breastfeeding pages on Instagram to help me prepare and understand what to expect. Because of this, I decided to put zero pressure on myself. I set myself a goal, try breastfeeding when she’s born and make it to 12 weeks.

Instant skin-to-skin after birth

After a bit of a traumatic birth, I had instant skin to skin with my daughter and she latched immediately. This started our wonderful journey. The first couple of days I was a bit sore, but thanks to “My Expert Midwife – No Harm Nipple Balm”, the soreness soon subsided.

I am so glad I did my research before hand, as I didn’t have a clue about cluster feeding but oh my gosh those cluster feeds were a lot. The constant feeding made me feel dizzy, almost like I was having an out of body experience so my biggest tip is snacks, and lots of them. Pregnancy hunger is nothing compared to breastfeeding hunger. 

I always fed Indie on demand, sticking to zero schedule and that seemed to work really well for us. Fortunately, I never had a milk supply issue and never suffered from mastitis. I did attempt to pump so that Indie could take a bottle every now and then. But I didn’t like being stuck to the sofa with my breast pump so I was not consistent with this which let Indie to refusing a bottle.

I always fed Indie on demand, sticking to zero schedule and that seemed to work really well for us. Fortunately, I never had a milk supply issue and never suffered from mastitis.

By the time I returned to work at 9 months, I had enough milk stored up that Indie had my expressed milk from doidy cup and sometimes off a small spoon. Generally though, because I was only working 9am-2pm, she would just have food and then feed before work and right after. That worked well for us.

We started co-sleeping after 6 weeks

In the first few weeks, the night feeds got so tiring and I would find myself drifting off whilst holding her. After 6 weeks, I saw a post on safe co-sleeping and decided to give this a try. I wish I had done this from day one! The moment we started co-sleeping, I started getting more sleep. I would put Indie in her next to me crib at the beginning of the night then when she woke, put her in bed with me and fed her whilst I slept. My little boob monster was happy with the feeds and I got more sleep. Everyone was happier.

After 6 weeks, I saw a post on safe co-sleeping and decided to give this a try. I wish I had done this from day one!

The plan was to move Indie into her own room at 6 months but she had other ideas. We continued to co-sleep until she was one year old when we got Indie a floor bed for her room. I’d always feed Indie to sleep for naps and bedtime, then in the night I would usually end up in her bed for the rest of the night feeding her. It worked for us and made sure we all got plenty of sleep.

I didn’t want to put a time limit on our breastfeeding journey

When I made it to 12 weeks, I started to set myself goals. I wanted to make it to 6 months breastfeeding, then 9 months when I returned to work, then one year. Once I reached my one year goal I decided I wasn’t going to put a time limit on our journey and I would continue to breastfeed for as long as it worked for both of us. 

I found out I was pregnant with my second child in April 2023. Indie was about 2 and a half at this point and we were still feeding. Between the pregnancy nausea and tiredness I found it hard but she was feeding once or twice a day at this point so I carried on.

I only stopped breastfeeding my toddler when I was pregnant

After a few months, I noticed Indies feeds getting more frequent and she was getting frustrated. Breastfeeding became uncomfortable for me and I was no longer enjoying it. I noticed that my milk supply had decreased massively. I decided to have one last bedtime feed then stop cold turkey. With how low my supply was this worked and I had no side effects.

I found out I was pregnant with my second in April 2023. Indie was about 2 and a half at this point and we were still feeding.

Indie only asked for a feed once more, I said no more feed and she was okay with this. This was when she was 2 years 10 months old, and it was definitely the right time for both of us. We still have the closeness as I cuddle Indie to sleep every night. 

Baby number two is due any day now

My second baby (another daughter) is due January 2024…any day now! Of course I plan to breastfeed again. I have bought a breast pump again but a wearable one this time so I’m not stuck in one place holding a pump in place with wires everywhere. I plan to be more consistent so my partner can do an evening feed so I can continue to do bedtime routine with Indie.

Just like the last time I will not put any pressure on myself and take each day as it comes. I will most likely co-sleep from day 1. The more sleep I get the better a person and parent I will be to both my baby and toddler. I will definitely make sure I have snacks and water on hand. I’ll also attempt to drink less caffeine as I’m sure the amount of tea/coffee I drank was the cause of Indie’s terrible sleep right up until I stopped breastfeeding her. 

My biggest advice to anyone wanting to breastfeed, is to do your research, follow breastfeeding pages, and don’t put pressure on yourself. Do what feels right for you.