“I never planned to breastfeed but with baby no.2 it was the easiest thing to do”

With my first baby, I never had any desire to breastfeed. My job as a neonatal nurse meant I’d seen enough boobs and milk to last a lifetime! As such, breastfeeding was never part of my plan and I was happy to bottle feed my first baby. When it came time to have my second child I thought I’d do exactly the same, but my circumstances had changed and I began to think breastfeeding was probably the easiest option all-round. This is my story.

I’m a neonatal nurse but never wanted to breastfeed

Breastfeeding was never part of my plan. As a neonatal nurse I’ve seen enough boobs and milk to last a lifetime but it was something I never fancied doing myself. I was happy to express for as long as I could and bottle feed my first baby. And of course with him being the first, there was plenty of time to sit down and express between feeds.

I was happy to express for as long as I could and bottle feed my first baby

Things changed with baby no.2

Then 19 months later along came baby number 2 – a little girl. After a pretty straightforward pregnancy again I planned to do the same and bottle feed. However, after a home birth that ended up in an overnight stay at the hospital for a blood transfusion and a longer recovery, I found I was struggling.

After a couple of weeks, all the expressing and bottles with a newborn and toddler to entertain was too much (especially when hubby was starting back in work). I honestly just got lazy and started sticking her on the boob because I couldn’t be bothered with having to clean bottles and express as well as feeding. 

I honestly just got lazy and started sticking her on the boob because I couldn’t be bothered with having to clean bottles and express as well as feeding. 

Initially, I just started putting her on for night feeds but it didn’t take long for it to be daytime as well. Luckily she just took to it and had plenty of tips from work to help it go smoothly. I also had a silicone pump to keep a freezer supply (shame to waste milk when you’re like a dairy cow). I have never tried a hand pump or electric pump as I always found it easy to use the silicone pump and hand express (if you want to breastfeed I’d definitely learn how to hand express as well).

I’ve never felt gushy about breastfeeding

We’ve never really experienced problems or issues and have had a pretty smooth journey. The only problem is I have a booby monster who won’t give up. If I’m honest I’ve never felt all gushy about how lovely it is as I don’t feel like I’ve bonded with her more just because she’s breastfed (and a couple of bites is enough to put you off for life), but secretly I’m happy to let her continue because I’d miss having something only I can give her.  I would probably breastfeed again (not that we will be having any more) but I don’t regret bottle feeding my first as that’s what was right for us at the time. 

I don’t regret bottle feeding my first as that’s what was right for us at the time. 

14 months on and here we still are!

We’ve managed to stop night feeds but she still likes the comfort for a nap and bedtime. And she’s old enough now that depending on what I’m wearing she can basically whip a boob out and help herself! So despite being adamant I’d never breastfeed here we are 14 months later, still doing it! 

For anyone who’s thinking of giving it a go I’d say just do it, but don’t put too much pressure on yourself, get all the help and support you can, if you enjoy and it works great, if it doesn’t or you hate it that’s also ok. 

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