How Your Eating Traumas Affect Your Baby’s First Bites

Eating is an essential part of life, not just for survival but for enjoyment—good food can bring us happiness. When you become a parent, feeding quickly becomes one of your top concerns.

For breastfeeding moms especially, feeding can be a source of constant worry: Are they eating enough? How often should they feed? Are their nappies normal? Without being able to measure breastmilk directly, anxiety can creep in.

For breastfeeding moms especially, feeding can be a source of constant worry

Once everything finally settles and you feel confident about feeding, a new challenge arises: introducing solids.

Introducing Solids To Your Baby

Leading health and child development organizations recommend waiting until your baby is ready to start solids, which is typically around six months of age—even for formula-fed babies. Readiness for solids isn’t just about turning 4, 5, or 6 months old; it’s about developmental cues. Preparation is key, and as that time approaches, you might start to feel the need to prepare yourself for this next phase.

Readiness for solids isn’t just about turning 4, 5, or 6 months old; it’s about developmental cues.

So, you dive into Google searches, exploring finger foods and spoon shapes, researching portion sizes and food quality, and learning the difference between choking and gagging. But in all of this preparation, you might overlook something crucial: you are your baby’s biggest role model.

Babies learn everything from us, from their first smile to their first steps. They mirror what they see. While you’re focused on what and how to offer food, it’s just as important to focus on yourself.

As parents, it’s easy to put our own needs aside. We get so caught up in caring for our babies that we forget about our own wellbeing. But your mental and physical health plays a vital role in raising a healthy, happy child.

Understanding Your Own Relationship With Food

Take a moment to reflect on your own relationship with food and eating habits. What messages are you unintentionally passing on to your baby?

It might be that you grew up in a family where you were expected to finish everything on your plate—even if you didn’t like it. Maybe you still do that now.

Perhaps you come from a background where food was scarce, and now you savor a wide variety of foods—but sometimes without control.

Maybe you love eating but feel guilty afterward. Or perhaps you’ve struggled with eating disorders, weight issues, or body image challenges. The list is endless.

And it’s not just about you; it’s about your partner, too. Men often carry just as many eating-related traumas (if not more) as women. Many were raised to “be a big, strong man,” which often led to overeating.

Men often carry just as many eating-related traumas (if not more) as women.

These experiences, processed or unprocessed, shape how we approach food and feeding. They play a significant role when it’s time to introduce solids to your baby.

Reflecting on Your Own Experiences With Food

Take a moment to pause again and think about your relationship with food. Do you have any eating-related traumas? Would you like to offer food to your baby in the same way it was offered to you as a child? Do you want to create the same atmosphere around the table?

If your answer is “yes,” you’re lucky—keep going! Celebrate the positive relationship you’ve built.

If your answer is “no,” don’t worry. Here are some tips to help you work through those feelings and prepare yourself before you begin introducing solids to your baby.

1. Address the Problem

Recognize and acknowledge any eating-related traumas or challenges you may have. If necessary, seek help from a qualified professional or talk openly about your feelings with your partner or support network.

Recognize and acknowledge any eating-related traumas or challenges you may have. I

Addressing these issues head-on will give you a stronger foundation to approach feeding with confidence.

2. Build Healthy Habits

Before introducing solids, start modeling positive eating behaviors for your baby. Show them that eating and drinking can be an enjoyable experience. Here’s how:

• Make Time for Shared Moments: Sit down with your baby, even if it’s just for a few minutes. For example, pop them into their high chair while you enjoy a quick snack like avocado toast or tea.
• Demonstrate Healthy Habits: Use these moments to show that you respect your body and time by eating slowly, sitting down, and avoiding rushed meals while standing. This not only sets a positive example but also helps you build a healthier relationship with yourself.
• Teach Through Observation: Your baby will learn by watching you. They’ll notice how you move your hands, mouth, and jaw, how you sit, and how you use utensils. These small actions contribute to their learning and development.

Healthy habits don’t stop at eating. Try to appreciate and love your body for what it has achieved—bringing your beautiful little human(s) into the world.

3. Reframe Body Image and Eating Habits

Show your baby a good example by being kind to yourself. Accept compliments graciously and reframe any negative statements about your body or eating habits. For example, instead of saying, “I shouldn’t have eaten that,” try, “That meal was delicious, and I enjoyed it.”

4. Set Boundaries Around Eating

When it comes to introducing solids, remember: your baby, your decisions. Let your family know your goals for this stage and stick to them.

The festive season and special occasions like birthdays can be especially challenging, as it often brings shared meals and family gatherings. During these times:

• Focus on quality over quantity, even when others don’t.
• Stand firm if relatives try to pressure you into making a “big show” of your baby eating or commenting on their messy eating habits.

Fostering A Healthy Relationship With Food

It can be difficult to stand up for yourself and your baby, but remember—it’s not about the calories. It’s about fostering a healthy relationship with food from the very beginning.

By addressing your own feelings about eating, modeling positive behaviors, and setting clear boundaries, you’ll create a strong, healthy foundation for your baby’s journey into solids.